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Values & Practical Goals

The "best" approach is the one you'll actually do. Optimal means nothing if it's not sustainable for YOUR life.

📖 The Story​

Meet Sarah, Marcus, and The Garcias​

Sarah, 42, "The Perfectionist Who Quit": Sarah read everything. She knew the optimal protein intake, the ideal macro split, the perfect workout program. She had spreadsheets.

But she also had two kids, a demanding job, and an hour commute. The "optimal" plan required 90 minutes at the gym daily, meal prep on Sundays, and tracking every bite.

She tried. She quit. She tried again. She quit again. Each failure felt worse. "I know what I'm supposed to do—why can't I just DO it?"

Then she tried something different: 3 workouts per week, 30 minutes each. No tracking—just eating protein at every meal and mostly whole foods. Not optimal on paper. But she's been consistent for two years now. She's lost 15 pounds, kept it off, and—most importantly—doesn't hate the process.

Perfect on paper, abandoned in practice = zero results. Good enough, done consistently = transformative.

Marcus, 28, "The All-or-Nothing Athlete": Marcus trained like a professional athlete. Two-hour workouts. Precise macros. Perfect sleep schedules. And he looked amazing—for about 3 months at a time.

Then life would happen: work deadline, relationship stress, social event. He'd miss one workout. Then another. Then he'd stop completely. "What's the point if I can't do it right?"

This cycle repeated for years. Gain 20 pounds of muscle, lose 15. Get shredded, get soft.

His turning point: a coach who asked, "What if 'good enough' was actually good enough?" Marcus now trains 4x/week, eats well 80% of the time, and has maintained a physique he's happy with for three years. Not his peak—but consistent, sustainable, enjoyable.

The Garcias, "The Whole Family Challenge": Miguel and Rosa wanted to get healthier, but they had three kids (ages 6, 9, 13), limited budget, and no time. Every health plan assumed single adults with disposable income and empty calendars.

They tried:

  • Meal prep → Kids wouldn't eat it, food waste
  • Gym memberships → Childcare logistics impossible
  • Healthy recipes → Too expensive, too time-consuming

What finally worked:

  • Family walks after dinner (free, together time)
  • Base meals everyone eats + modifications (pasta with protein for parents, plain for kids)
  • Movement as play (basketball, bike rides, not "workouts")
  • 80/20 rule (healthy most of the time, pizza Fridays guilt-free)

No one has six-pack abs. But everyone's active, the kids have healthy relationships with food, and health doesn't create family stress.

🚶 The Journey​

Timeline: From Struggle to Sustainability​

Goal: Strip away complexity, find the minimum

Week 1-2: The Audit

  • Track what you actually do (not what you plan to do)
  • Identify patterns: when do you quit? what triggers it?
  • Note energy levels, stress, and competing priorities

Week 3-4: The Minimum

  • Ask: "What's the least I could do that would still count?"
  • Start there—even if it feels too easy
  • Build consistency before adding anything

Signs It's Working:

  • You're actually doing it
  • It doesn't require motivation or willpower
  • You don't dread it

Common Mistakes:

  • Adding complexity too soon
  • Choosing "minimum" that's still too ambitious
  • Comparing to what you used to do

🧠 The Science​

What Research Says About Sustainability​

How Habits Actually Form:

Contrary to the "21 days" myth, habit formation takes 18-254 days, with an average of 66 days (Lally et al., 2010). The range depends on:

  • Complexity of the behavior
  • Consistency of context (same time, place, triggers)
  • Individual differences

The Habit Loop (Duhigg):

Key Insights:

  • Habits form faster with consistent cues (time, location, preceding action)
  • Small habits form faster than complex ones
  • Missing occasionally doesn't reset progress—missing twice in a row does

Implementation Intentions: "If [situation], then [behavior]" statements increase follow-through by 2-3x.

  • "If it's 6am, I'll put on workout clothes"
  • "If I sit down to dinner, I'll eat vegetables first"

👀 Signs & Signals​

How to Know If Your Approach Is Working​

Green Flags (Sustainability Indicators):

SignalWhat It Means
You do it without thinking about itHabit formation is progressing
Missed days don't spiral into missed weeksResilience is built
You're getting results (even slowly)The basics are working
Energy and mood are stable or improvingNot depleting yourself
You don't dread your workouts/mealsSustainable relationship
Life stress doesn't derail everythingSystem is robust

Yellow Flags (Adjustment Needed):

SignalPossible CauseAdjustment
Requiring willpower dailyNot a habit yetSimplify more, anchor to existing habits
Dreading workoutsWrong modality or too muchFind something enjoyable, reduce volume
Missing 2+ sessions per weekToo ambitiousReduce to "too easy" and rebuild
Recovery from disruptions takes weeksFragile systemBuild flexibility protocols
Results but miserableWrong approach for youReassess values alignment

Red Flags (System Failure):

SignalWhat It MeansAction
Quit entirely after missing onceAll-or-nothing thinkingAddress underlying beliefs
Health goals harming relationshipsValues misalignmentRe-prioritize
Chronic fatigue/injuryOverdoing itScale back significantly
Obsessive thoughts about food/exerciseUnhealthy relationship formingSeek professional help
Guilt and shame cyclesPerfectionism problemWork on mindset first

🎯 Practical Application​

Making Health Work in Real Life​

The $50-75/Week Approach:

Cheap Protein Sources (per 30g protein):

FoodCostPrep Time
Eggs$0.80-1.0010 min
Chicken thighs$1.00-1.5030 min
Canned beans$0.50-0.755 min
Cottage cheese$0.75-1.000 min
Frozen ground turkey$1.25-1.7520 min
Greek yogurt (bulk)$0.80-1.200 min
Lentils (dry)$0.30-0.5030 min

Budget Shopping Strategy:

  1. Buy protein in bulk/on sale, freeze
  2. Frozen vegetables = fresh nutrition, lower cost, no waste
  3. Store-brand everything (same quality)
  4. Seasonal produce (local, cheaper)
  5. Batch cook grains (rice, oats, lentils)

Sample $60/Week Grocery List:

  • Eggs (2 dozen) - $6
  • Chicken thighs (3 lbs) - $9
  • Canned beans (6 cans) - $6
  • Greek yogurt (large container) - $7
  • Frozen vegetables (5 bags) - $10
  • Rice (2 lbs) - $3
  • Bananas, apples, carrots, cabbage - $8
  • Oats (large container) - $4
  • Olive oil, basic spices - $7

📸 What It Looks Like​

Real Examples of Sustainable Approaches​

Profile: 40-hour+ workweek, commute, limited energy

Weekly Schedule:

DayExerciseNutrition
Monday30 min gym (lunch)Meal prepped lunch
TuesdayWalking meetingsSame lunch
Wednesday30 min gym (lunch)Same lunch
ThursdayRestSame lunch
Friday30 min gym (lunch)Eat out with coworkers
SaturdayLonger walk or hikeNormal eating
SundayActive rest, meal prep (1 hr)Prep 5 lunches, cut vegetables

Total Time: ~3 hrs exercise, 1 hr food prep = 4 hrs/week

Results Expectation: Slow, steady progress. Maintenance or slight improvement. Stress reduction. Energy improvement.

🚀 Getting Started​

The Simplification Protocol​

Week 1: The Audit

Don't change anything. Just observe and record:

  • When do you eat? What? How do you feel after?
  • When do you move? What counts as movement?
  • When do you quit things? What triggers it?
  • What has worked before, even briefly?

Week 2: The Minimum

Answer these questions:

  1. What's the absolute least exercise that would still feel like "doing something"?
  2. What's one food change that would be almost effortless?
  3. What time of day is most reliable for habits?

Start with those answers. Nothing more.

Week 3-4: Consistency Testing

Your ONLY goal is consistency:

  • Did you do the minimum? Check.
  • That's it. Nothing else matters yet.
  • If you miss, just resume. No guilt.

Minimum Examples:

LevelExerciseNutrition
Very low10 min walk dailyAdd one vegetable to dinner
Low20 min workout 2x/weekProtein at breakfast
Moderate30 min workout 3x/weekProtein at every meal
Standard45 min workout 4x/weekMeal prep weekends

Key Principle: Start lower than you think you need. You can always add. You can't build on a foundation that keeps crumbling.

Month 2+: Gradual Building

Only after 4 weeks of 90%+ consistency:

  • Add ONE thing
  • Wait 2 weeks
  • If consistent, add another
  • If struggling, stay or go back

🔧 Troubleshooting​

When Sustainable Feels Impossible​

ProblemLikely CauseSolution
"I always quit after 2-3 weeks"Starting too aggressiveCut your plan in half. Then in half again.
"I can't find ANY time"Time not the real issueAudit actual time use. Something is taking it.
"My family won't let me eat healthy"Wrong framingModify family meals, don't create separate meals
"I travel too much"No travel protocolCreate minimal travel routine (hotel workouts, food rules)
"Work is too stressful"Health feels like another demandReframe: minimum health supports work performance
"I hate cooking"Trying to be a chefSimple food is fine. Rotisserie chicken + salad = done.

The "All or Nothing" Fix:

If you tend toward all-or-nothing thinking:

  1. Create a "Minimum Viable Day"

    • What counts as a "win" on your worst day?
    • Example: 5-minute walk + one healthy meal

  2. Rate days on effort, not perfection

    • Not "did I hit all targets?" but "did I try?"
    • 50% effort days count

  3. "Never miss twice" rule

    • Missing once is fine
    • Missing twice starts a pattern
    • After one miss, next day is non-negotiable minimum

When Life Explodes:

New baby? Major illness? Career crisis? Family emergency?

  • Switch to maintenance mode immediately
  • Define minimum (maybe just: don't gain weight, move a little)
  • No guilt, no timeline
  • Return to building when life stabilizes
  • You haven't failed—you've adapted
For Mo

Assessment Questions​

  1. What have they tried before? (History reveals patterns)
  2. Why did previous attempts fail? (Find the real barriers)
  3. What does their week actually look like? (Time and energy available)
  4. What are their non-negotiable priorities? (Family, work, other)
  5. What's their ideal time investment? (Be realistic)
  6. What's the minimum they'd be satisfied with? (Find the floor)
  7. Are they all-or-nothing types? (Requires special attention)
  8. What's their current season of life? (Adjust expectations)

Key Guidance​

For the Overwhelmed:

  • Start with ONE thing
  • Make it stupidly easy to succeed
  • Build consistency before adding complexity
  • "Perfect is the enemy of good"
  • Permission to do less than they think they should

For the All-or-Nothing Type:

  • Challenge binary thinking explicitly
  • 70% effort sustained > 100% effort abandoned
  • Missing one workout isn't failure—missing two starts a pattern
  • Flexibility is a feature, not a bug
  • Create "minimum viable day" protocols

For the Busy:

  • Time-efficient training exists (30 min 3x/week works)
  • Meal prep doesn't have to be elaborate
  • Movement snacks throughout the day count
  • Something > nothing, always
  • Optimize convenience, not perfection

For the Conflicted:

  • Health serves life, not the other way around
  • What do they WANT health to enable?
  • Trade-offs are normal—what matters most to them?
  • There's no wrong answer, only clarity needed
  • Sometimes the "right" answer is less health focus

For the Budget-Constrained:

  • Health doesn't require expensive food or gym memberships
  • Cheap protein sources are plentiful
  • Bodyweight exercise is free and effective
  • Simple food is fine—doesn't need to be gourmet

Red Flags to Address​

  • "I have to do it perfectly or not at all" → All-or-nothing thinking needs work first
  • Guilt and shame when missing workouts → Unhealthy relationship forming
  • Health goals conflicting with important relationships → Values misalignment
  • Ignoring major life constraints → Plan will fail—address constraints
  • Comparing to people with different circumstances → Unfair comparison
  • History of extreme approaches → May need gradual recalibration
  • Signs of disordered eating/exercise → Refer to professional

Example Coaching Scenarios​

Scenario 1: "I've tried everything and always quit after a few weeks."

  • Explore what "everything" means (usually elaborate plans)
  • Find the smallest possible habit that would still count
  • Make failure nearly impossible (2 pushups/day level)
  • Build from there ONLY after 90%+ consistency

Scenario 2: "I don't have time to work out."

  • Challenge: do they have 30 minutes, 3x/week? Really?
  • If truly not, start with 10 minutes daily
  • Movement snacks: stairs, walks, brief circuits
  • Question: what would they give up for health? (Reveals priorities)

Scenario 3: "I feel guilty for not doing more."

  • Validate: cultural pressure to optimize everything is real
  • Reality check: what's actually necessary for their goals?
  • Permission: good enough is actually good enough
  • Reframe: consistency at 70% beats burnout at 100%

Scenario 4: "My spouse/kids/job won't let me stick to a plan."

  • Life context matters—don't blame constraints
  • Design AROUND constraints, not against them
  • Family workouts, walking meetings, etc.
  • Sometimes the season of life means maintenance mode—and that's okay

Scenario 5: "I can't afford healthy food."

  • Budget-friendly healthy eating is possible
  • Provide specific cheap options (eggs, beans, frozen vegetables)
  • Simple is fine—doesn't need to be Instagram-worthy
  • Focus on protein and vegetables, the rest is flexible

❓ Common Questions​

"Isn't this just settling for mediocrity?"

No. This is recognizing that consistency beats intensity. The "optimal" approach you quit is objectively worse than the "good enough" approach you maintain. Long-term results require long-term adherence. Most people overestimate what complexity adds and underestimate what consistency delivers.

"But I used to be able to do so much more."

That was then. Life changes. Comparing yourself to past-you with different circumstances isn't fair or useful. The question isn't "what could I do before?" but "what can I sustain now?" You can always build up later if circumstances change.

"Won't I get better results with a more intense approach?"

Maybe short-term. But research consistently shows that moderate, sustainable approaches outperform intense approaches over time because people actually stick with them. The best 6-week program, abandoned, delivers zero long-term results.

"How do I know when I'm being lazy vs. realistic?"

Lazy: capable of more, choosing not to put in effort Realistic: acknowledging actual constraints and optimizing within them

If you're consistently hitting your minimums and feeling good, you're being realistic. If you're consistently missing even easy targets and feeling bad, something else is wrong (not laziness—likely barrier identification or mental health).

"My family/friends think I'm not trying hard enough."

Their circumstances aren't your circumstances. Politely explain that you're doing what's sustainable for YOUR life. If they persist, consider whether their opinion is worth the stress it's causing. Your health approach is yours.

"What if even the minimum feels impossible?"

Then the minimum isn't minimum enough. Can you walk for 5 minutes? Can you eat one piece of fruit? Start there. If even that feels impossible, there may be underlying issues (depression, chronic illness, major life stress) that need addressing first. Health habits build on a foundation—if the foundation is crumbling, address that.

⚖️ Where Research Disagrees​

TopicPerspective 1Perspective 2Practical Takeaway
Habit formation timeline21 days (popular belief)18-254 days, avg 66 (Lally 2010)Expect at least 2 months for automatic behavior
Willpower depletionLimited resource that depletes (Baumeister)Beliefs about willpower matter more (recent research)Design systems that don't require willpower
Optimal vs. sustainableOptimal protocols deliver best resultsAdherence predicts outcomes more than protocolPrioritize sustainability over optimization
Meal frequencySpecific timing matters for metabolismTotal intake matters more than timing for mostEat in whatever pattern you'll maintain
Tracking foodEssential for awareness and successCan promote obsession and reduce enjoymentTry it, keep if helpful, stop if harmful

✅ Quick Reference​

The Hierarchy of Importance:

  1. Showing up (most important)
  2. Effort when you show up
  3. Specific details of what you do (least important)

Minimum Effective Health:

  • Move 3x/week, 30+ minutes
  • Protein at every meal
  • Vegetables daily
  • Sleep 7+ hours
  • Manage stress (any method)

When to Simplify:

  • Missing >2 sessions per week
  • Dreading the process
  • Life stress is high
  • Returning from a break

When to Add Complexity:

  • 90%+ consistency for 4+ weeks
  • Energy and motivation are high
  • Results have plateaued with basics
  • You genuinely want more

Recovery Protocol After Disruption:

  1. Acknowledge: disruption happened, that's life
  2. Minimum: resume with easiest version
  3. Rebuild: gradually add back complexity
  4. Learn: what triggered the disruption? Can you plan for it?

The 80/20 Summary:

  • 80% of results from: protein, movement, sleep, stress management
  • 20% of results from: timing, supplements, specific protocols, optimization

💡 Key Takeaways​

Essential Insights
  • The best plan is the one you'll do. Optimal is meaningless if unsustainable.
  • 80% of results come from fundamentals. You don't need complexity to improve.
  • Your life is the constraint. Design around it, don't fight against it.
  • Trade-offs are real. You can't optimize everything. Choose what matters most.
  • Seasons change. What's right for this phase might not be right for the next.
  • Consistency beats intensity. Every time, over the long run.
  • Good enough is good enough. Stop chasing perfect.

📚 Sources​

Habit Science:

  • Lally, P. et al. (2010). How are habits formed: Modelling habit formation in the real world. European Journal of Social Psychology 🔬 Tier A
  • Wood, W. & RĂĽnger, D. (2016). Psychology of Habit. Annual Review of Psychology 🔬 Tier A
  • Gardner, B. (2015). A review and analysis of the use of 'habit' in understanding, predicting and influencing health-related behaviour. Health Psychology Review 🔬 Tier A

Adherence Research:

  • Johnston, B.C. et al. (2014). Comparison of weight loss among named diet programs in overweight and obese adults. JAMA 🔬 Tier A
  • Del Corral, P. et al. (2009). Effect of dietary adherence with or without exercise on weight loss. Obesity 🔬 Tier B

Willpower & Self-Control:

  • Baumeister, R.F. & Tierney, J. (2011). Willpower: Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength đź“š Tier C
  • Job, V. et al. (2010). Ego depletion—Is it all in your head? Psychological Science 🔬 Tier A

Behavior Change:

  • Clear, J. (2018). Atomic Habits đź“š Tier C
  • Fogg, B.J. (2020). Tiny Habits đź“š Tier C

Practical Sustainability:

  • Precision Nutrition research on coaching outcomes đź“Š Tier B
  • National Weight Control Registry (long-term weight maintenance data) đź“Š Tier B

🔗 Related Topics​

Related Goals:

TopicLinkWhy Relevant
Building habitsHabitsDeep dive on habit formation
Behavior changeBehavior ChangePsychology of lasting change
ExperimentationExperimentationFinding what works for you
MaintenanceMaintenanceThe long game after reaching goals
TroubleshootingTroubleshootingWhen things aren't working
BioindividualityBioindividualityWhy one-size-fits-all fails

Related Wellness Science:

TopicLinkWhy Relevant
Habit FormationWellness FoundationsUnderstanding the science of behavior change
Stress ManagementStress & ResilienceManaging stress while building sustainable habits
Mental HealthMental Health & NutritionHow psychology impacts adherence and habit-building